Over the garden my piano floats with a bum note
Followed by lamps, bedclothes
pot plants, flat screen TV, your vast CD collection
And carrier bags distended with crockery
And now we're just waiting for the phone call
from our solicitor

I grew up on Whitebridge Estate
Our house backed right onto the old tramway
The smell of freshly-baked oaties
Curls like a Slow Worm through my memories
Brand new skateboard echoing along the ginnel
Staying up late to watch the England-Germany semifinal
The long summers, my brothеr and me
Past fishing in the quarry and climbing trees
Great citiеs of Lego sprout
across the darkened plane of the garage floor

Blasting Erasure, "Blue Savannah" we pull onto the drive
Our headlights like dancing sprites
reflect in the porch window
The previous occupant
a retired civil engineer and recent widower
Has left us a prezzy in the fridge
A giant bottle of bubbly

Things started to get pretty bad
When Nissan made my dad redundant
All he'd do was watch telly
Sinking lagers steadily
Tempers boiled, dinner spoiled
Gladiators versus Noel's House Party

Having a curry on crossed legs surrounded by boxes
We take a drunken selfie and WhatsApp it to your family
Then I give myself a headache
blowing up the air bed for our first sleep
Jolted awake, the central heating groans: Where am I?

I'm up in the loft playing Doom
There's an awful crashing and banging
coming from the living room
I should be running down the stairs
But I just sit, frozen in my chair
Dad's shouting, "I can't take it anymore"
Then he's vanished in the blink of a slamming door

I spent the morning traipsing round Ikea and B&Q
Hammers and nails, a curtain rail
Pants, mugs, sinks, plugs, and a Persian rug
Then we had our appointment with the midwife
And here we are painting the little bedroom
It won't be long til the baby arrives