There's cold weather today

It is warmer inside the hospital walls

And warmer still inside the warm oasis of the womb

And there the child rests

Calm, unmoving, silent

The alleged father came as a simple formality

But as he saw his former lover

with her arms coiled around her head

Sobbing violently

He realised what had happened to his son

He could hear the genuinity of her voice

He could taste the pain

And as she, broken, lay her tearful eyes upon his shoulder

He felt a sort of contentment

A strange sub-speciation of joy, keep the palm warm

He did not fight the joy

He allowed it to infect him

He allowed it to seep into his core

And for the first time, he was truly elated

I am nothing, I am all

I will never fucking die

I am Jesus, I am God

I will never fucking die

Kids don’t have anymore goddamn respect

He knew this because every day the same three

little shits came over to his place on the corner

Laughing and snarling like dogs

And threw giddy kicks and punches at a man

who had fought two wars for their freedom

And by the time he had lost count of the beatings

They began to become a blurry miasma of pain and blood

He had gotten sick of the ritual

So he scrounged and saved

Every charitable cent set aside for when the day came

He was decades beyond his fighting years

But it didn't bother him

It only excited him more, fuelling the fire

that was his quivering dungeon to life

He began looking forward to the beatings

He savoured every bruise, smiled with each profanity

For it only served to incentivise the brutality

Of what would surely be their final encounter

But when the day finally came

And the sun and the stars aligned

He looked upon the approaching silhouettes

Then almost manic, gushing happiness

A happiness that pulled yet further

as he raised the gun gleefully

Curled a jovial finger around the trigger

And fired an unshelled bullet through the child's forehead

And those sooner were the gelatinous

stripes of blue and red flashing around him

And he was raising the barrel to his radiant smile

And dying a peaceful, thunderous death

And the children ran, tears of shock and terror

Streaming down their once smug patronising faces

They laughed no longer

For justice had been done

I am earth, I am sky

I will never fucking die

I am body, I am mind

I will never fucking die